Check it out

Click on Ward to Go. My new camera is awesome. Angie......we need to go on a picture taking field trip one day I don't have Heath!

Thursday Thinkings

• I am going to have to get a job to support my shopping addiction or stop shopping
• I can't wait to use my Nikon. Awesome sale at Target
• I feel Jeff and I are closer than ever
• We have no big plans for the holiday weekend
• I am volunteering for Power House this Sunday. No dancing yet for me. I am so white!
• I am not going to take a nap today
• Heath is going to Mom's Day Out next week, Tues and Thur are free
• Heath and I don't shop so well together, go figure
• I am keeping Brewer
• I secretly want to be a professional photographer ( mostly of nature )
• I am missing my annual Red Lobster Dinner with my friend Angela, because my kids are crazy
• I can't wait to tailgate at the UCF game, I just like to tailgate
• I would eat lunch out everyday, I love lunch
• I wonder what it is like to have a six pack (ABS)
• I have a huge bucket of Avocados from the storm last week and I have no idea how to tell if they are ripe......sorry Amanda
• Where are the hurricanes? Just a mild one!
  
• I miss Keisha, if your reading this....let's do lunch!
• I miss my mommy too!
• Shake and Bake!
  

Alone

I was able to get back into my book last night. The last chapter I read was about loneliness. I could relate.

I am so content living in my own little world. I hate being put in new social situations. I wish I could be myself from the get-go.

How will I make connections with people if I don't come out of the house every once in a while?

I have always been scared to make the first move. I am not good at phone calls or making friends in the neighborhood.

I use all the excuses I can think of. But I think it all comes down to fear. Life is short.....I must get over this. Maybe there is a seminar out there-HA!

The chapter also made a point to describe the loneliness of Hell. I think of the worse suicidal thoughts, rock bottom loneliness , nobody loves me feelings. Hell will feel this way 24/7. That is a sickening feeling. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

Why do I let myself become so recluse sometimes? I do need to get it through my thick skull, if I don't get out there.....someone might miss out on the free gift of salvation!

Time to make connections and Forget the Fear!

Hot

IT'S SO HOT...

.....the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
.....the trees are whistling for the dogs.
.....the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
.....hot water now comes out of both taps.
.....you can make sun tea instantly.
.....you learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
.....the temperature drops below 95 F (35 C) and you feel a little chilly.
....you discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.
.....you discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
.....you actually burn your hand opening the car door.
......you break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.
.....your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out
and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death?"
.....you realize that asphalt has a liquid state.
.....the potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one
out and add butter.
.....the cows are giving evaporated milk.
.....farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from
laying boiled eggs.

The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Check this out.

I'm Back

I have so many thought running through my mind. Especially since I haven't done a real blog lately.

I really, really missed church on Sunday. We had a ball with the kids in Daytona for Heath's B-Day. We stayed at the Sun Viking Lodge. They had a 60 foot water slide. It was fun to watch all of us go down it. I'll try to get pics up on the other site soon.

I actually think it was good for me to take a break. I was able to reflect and search my heart and see where I am.

In the past I thought it was a battle between which churches were the most God honoring and righteous. Maybe it is because there are so many opinions out there. And when you are on the Internet searching, you can read a lot of crap.

I know some of my family members think I have gone of the deep end!

I really believe God has a place for all of us out there. There are so many opportunities for God to use us and make differences in other's life.

On to my other thought......

What does it feel like to know you could be 100% content if Jesus was the only one who loved you?

To experience true, pure joy.....I have to understand this. Can I ever be this content? I can say yes, but I know my human nature does not want me to believe this.

More later, got to get the rest of my thoughts together.

Heath-Happy Birthday

Blah

I have nothing to say. I think I am sad about the dog. I feel guilty. I will write again on Sun!

300 Profile Views

Today I mark 300 profile views. Who reads my crap anyways.....ha! You got to love me. By the way, if you click you profile view without logging in, you can make yourself look popular. I secretly do this!

More

I have decided I like to write in color and different fonts/sizes.

I was able to tell someone who used to go to our church how excited I am to be back at C3 and how I know 100% that this is where God wants me to serve. It felt so good not to be in a negative conversation.

In other news, I took Heath to get his haircut. Worst 15 min. of my life, no not really. He screamed and threw a fit. I don't know how she cut his hair. Next time he is going to get it buzzed!

Hell Yeah?

Why is hell a bad word or should I say sometimes used in colorful expression. I've decided the word does not offend me. I am glad I am not going there, but what made it a social no-no? I am not going around saying it.......I just thought it was food for thought.


I guess I am just trying to understand where cuss words or colorful words came from. I am sure every country has there own. I might say something that I don't even know is offensive to someone else.

What if I say, "Oh, Dookie!" Is it wrong because it is closely related to a four letter word. Does society decide what words are cuss words or is there a list of words we should never say somewhere out there?

I've always wondered this, even has a small child. How did cuss words get started and who decided they were offensive?

Relax

Today was going so well, until I tried to make a phone call to the house payment people. I have been paying extra online so that we will have enough when taxes are due. I pay through our bank and it doesn't tell the mortgage co. to put it toward escrow. I am afraid that we won't have enough when taxes are due.

Then I went to make dinner and realized the chicken is over a week old. There goes 10.00 down the drain. So I am in a bad mood now. I am writing so I will calm down and relax.

No one in my family is starving, sick, dying, afraid for their lives, etc. I need to put my life in perspective and not make this into such a big deal. I going to breathe and relax.

BTW-Kaelyn loved school. I guess it is a good sign she wants to go back!

Heath

It is just Heath and me. We have never really been left just the two of us since he was a baby.

I think he is ready for potty training. He went in the bathroom saying potty and then came out saying poop. He had pooped in his pants. Aren't these the signs? I am really lazy, Potty Training makes me crazy.

I am looking forward to a nap. I always like to fall asleep watching Days of Our Lives.

OK, this is a boring blog! Talk with ya'll later!

Sunday is My Funday

I meant to blog last night, but never got to it! The message brought on a lot of reflection for me.

Unfortunately, I can be a negative person. Trust me, I got it honest. I can complain and be a whiner. So when all the changes started happening at church, I found myself attracted to many negative conversations. I was upset for a number of stupid reasons. I was a tumor that could have easily turned into cancer.

I left church for a few months. I was to emotional. I couldn't focus or enjoy church without critiquing everything. I questioned everything. I thought my friends were part of a cult. (not really, I just like the word cult).

It took a few weeks of alone time to get my act together and realize all my reasons were stupid and self serving. My friends were a part of something amazing. A church that was not about me and my needs. A church who has a desire to make church for people who are unchurched.

My attitude has changed. I look forward to church and experience true worship. I don't criticize. I question nothing. I feel privileged to be a part of C3. It feels so good not to be negative. God has placed me where I need to serve.

Happy Birthday Angie

I thought I would try to come up with a witty poem, but I got nothing. Today is Angie's Birthday. She is the wife of our pastor at C3. I still remember the first time I met her. It was at some type of open house. Some lady was selling all kinds of different things for Christmas. I remember how I liked her glasses and sense of style. We probably said 5 words to each other. Now she gets to listen to me all the time-HA!

I really got to know Angie at a women's retreat a few years ago. Our room was connected and a bunch of us stayed up all night yapping. She got to see the real me and all my "glory"! I am pretty mouthy. If you are around me long enough, you realize I can say some crazy things. I have no idea what Angie thought of me, but she did talk to me again. I was afraid I might of said something offensive with my big mouth.

Unfortunately, I think people are sometimes afraid to show their true colors to a pastor's wife. Jeff was scared I was going to get us kicked out. Angie saw me and all my glory and still kept me as her friend.

This past year has been a rough one. Not one I think any of us would want to relive. I can't imagine how hard it must have been for Angie. It takes a strong women to be a pastor's wife. I am not sure how she survived, but she did!

Thank you Angie for being a role-model. Thank you for allowing me to be myself around you. I hope today is a good one for you. Happy Birthday!

Great Day for Me!

There most have been something in the air. I had a great day after a couple of moody days. Go figure, being a woman and all!

I went to Bucca with my mom and her friend. I got to shop kidless for 6 hours. I bought myself a swatch watch and new lipstick. The things that excite me!

I am looking forward to Sunday. I think I like it better than Sat!

I got nothing

Open House went really well. Kaelyn's teacher specializes in Speech and Language. It was meant to be. Kaelyn loved her classroom. She was mad we had to leave. No more fears for me.

My mom got a call this week from some friends to see if she was interested in selling her house. Took me 8 months, but whatever! She is actually thinking of trading with them. They live in a townhouse on the beach. I saw the pictures and think it is well suited for her! I hope it all works out. They are coming over on Sunday to look at her house.

It is neat to see how God has answered prayers in my family over the past few weeks.

On a side note, pray I find good home for Brewer. And remind me to never get another dog!

My New Best Friend

I just put an ad for Brewer in the paper. I am sad, but I think I made a big mistake. It is too much work. He is a good dog and a snuggler. I hope I can find a good home.

My Night

I did go to bed around 1 or 1:30. But it didn't last long. Heath awoke at 2:30. I put him in Kaelyn's other bed, so I wouldn't wake Jeff. I tried to lay with him, but for 30 min. he kicked me. He was wide awake. I was exhausted and tired of having my back kicked, so I went back to my room. Of course he followed me and kicked me for another 10 min. Next step, I put him back in his bed. 5 min. later, he was back. I made him sleep on the floor.

I don't remember what time the dog barked, but we went back to sleep in Kaelyn's room. I guess she(Kaelyn) woke up sometime early in the morning and had climbed in our bed. Jeff was on the couch.

My back hurts and this did nothing for my mood. I am going to make a cup of coffee and pretend I am on vacation!

Look for a pic on my other blog sometime later!

Why Can't I Fall Asleep?

Here are some of my reasons:

• I think the coal miners are going to be found
• I might have had to much caffeine
• I am in a bad mood for no reason and secretly want to drink
• I wish I didn't have to use my spell check so much
• I wonder if I painted the right colors so far in my house
• I think about the wallpaper I started to take off and got strep, so I didn't finish(this was back in November)
• I debate, should Jeff and I go to the Keys or a cruise for our Anniversary
• I wish I didn't have dark circles under my eyes
• I think of the poor people in Peru and feel guilty for letting stupid things bother me
• I wish it was cooler outside in the morning so I could have my quiet time outside
• I wish Brewer would sleep until 7 or 8
• I wish I could get over my fear of flying and enjoy it
• I wonder if it is easier being a Christ Follower if your in the Ministry. Although that has its set of problems too. I would think 3 times, instead of twice about writing I secretly want a drink-Ha!
• I wonder who reads my blogs, not my family....they are to afraid I'll write about them
• I am afraid I will go crazy staying home this year
• I want to sign Kaelyn up for Gymnastics, but I am afraid I'll get sick of taking her
• I wish I was friendlier to strangers
• I wish I was asleep
• I sometimes want a third child, I just don't want to take care of it
• I wish I had more motivation
• I wish the media would leave Britney Spears alone
• I wish I didn't think about stupid stuff
• I wish I could loose 10 pounds just by walking in the gym
• I am thinking about putting a leash on Heath when we go out in public
• I am glad I got my car back, I hate feeling trapped at home

OK, I think I am done. Just had to get some things off my chest. I am going to try and go back to bed with a clear head. Does counting sheep really work?

School

Tomorrow is Meet the Teacher at Kaelyn's school. I have to admit, I am a little nervous about sending her to a secular school. I am worried about the kids in her class. How will they influence her? Will they be hoodlums? I taught a PreK class in Sarasota. I am sure this is why all these thoughts enter my head.

I am going to change my attitude and show love. I am going to teach Kaelyn to love!

Is God Really Everywhere?

Last night I was reading in my book again and came across a thought provoking question. Is God really everywhere?

The author attended Reed College, a secular college. Every year the college holds a festival called Ren Fayre. I imagine it something like Woodstock without the music. I really didn't think it existed, until I looked it up online.

Anyways, the author and his friends decide to put up a confession booth up at the festival. They dressed in monk robes. The twist was, they apologized and confessed for not being more like Jesus.

Because they were bold and thought outside of the box, they were able to make a difference in their community. They started groups to go to homeless shelters, bible studies, and hosted a night where people could voice their hostility toward Christians. They did nothing but show Christ's love.

So is He everywhere? I believe so. There are opportunities all around us. Not to condemn the sinner, but show love like Jesus did.

I have to admit, I don't always seize moments like these. I have a fear of being hated for sharing my faith. I have to change my focus, to show love. By showing love, people will see Christ in me.

I like this concept!

"Get Rid of Church Members"

My new

favorite drink at Starbucks. The Chocolate Chip Frappuccino. Yum! I did make Amanda and Angie drive to the shopping center across the street because I was convinced there was another coffee shop over there. I think I must of dreamed it.

Thanks for the fun ladies. It is nice to go out and have girl talk!

Kaelyn is up with me right now. We both took long naps today. I couldn't wake up. I just wanted to lay there. I do wish my new friend would let me sleep in! She (Kaelyn) is going to draw a picture now. I love 4 year old drawings.

Today was one of those days I realized Heath is not a baby, he is getting a personality. He kept peeping around the corner with Kaelyn's pink glassed and popper toy. He was trying to get me to laugh. I love that about him!

They grow to fast!

Grace

I have forgotten God's grace. I am still into my book and there is a chapter on Grace. The author tries to make a pact with some friends that for a whole year the will not watch TV, smoke pipes, read their Bibles everyday, and I think fast on Mondays.

I don't think the pact lasted very long. Sometimes I get caught up in thinking about the extremes in my life I could change. Take the TVs out. Get ride of the Internet(oh my!). Home school my kids. Never let there be any opportunity that would effect my spiritual life.

The author made a point by saying how hard it is to accept God's free gift of eternal life and not feel like we have to give something back in return. He goes on to say we just have to love God. Through loving God, we seek out the things that are holy and God honoring.

Are we going to make mistakes as Christians? Sure. Does this mean I am going to sin intentionally, because I know God will forgive me? No. But it does make me realize that I need to love God more. I need to build my relationship stronger by learning to truly love Him!

It's Back

The Monterey Ranch Chicken at Wendy's!

Cleaning House

This is my favorite thing. And that is all I have to say about that!

Cheap Gym

I went to the cheap gym tonight. I hate when you first walk in. You feel like everyone else belongs and you are an outsider.

I weighed myself on two different scales and got two different results. I actually weighed 10 pounds more than I did a week ago. I wonder if that is a tactic or the ice cream caught up with me!

Sophie's Choice-Where's My Courage?

Most depressing movie I have watched in a long time. I started watching it last night and finished it this morning. If you haven't seen it, Sophie survived Auschwitz. But, not without emotional scarring.

There is a scene where she is ask to choose which child she can keep, her son or her daughter. The thought just sickened me. How do you make a choice like that. Knowing if you don't make a choice, they both will die. How do you live with yourself once you make the choice?

Throughout the movie, Sophie is given many chances to help defectors, but can never bring herself to do it. She is scared and never gets up the courage.

I take for granted the freedoms I have to worship God the way I want. I wonder how I would respond if I thought I would die or my children would die, because of my love for Christ. I guess there is a small part of me that thinks I wouldn't have the courage. I would let fear take over.

I have depressed myself....time to go find happy thoughts!

The Changing Church

What if churches never changed? We kept the buildings the same, the pews the same, sang the same hymnals, heard the same message at least once a year?

I would hate going. I would go out of guilt. I would let my mind wonder and more than likely never feel the Holy Spirit alive in me.

The world is always changing. Just look how far technology has come. I would have never thought I would have to give power point presentations when I taught. To 8 year olds! My wardrobe changes, my hair changes, and sadly my body too! You can't stop change. You can avoid it, but you can't stop it.

I think about when I am going to be a senior citizen. Will I hate my grand kids music and their style of music? I wonder what they will think of the music I currently listen to? I do hope I embrace change in the future when I am old and set in my ways.

I do plan on doing a lot of annoying things I am going to do when I am old. I will drive slow in the fast lane. I will wear a moo-moo with my Grannie panties. I will pass gas and dare anyone to say anything!

I am thankful for the changes that have happened at C3 and that will continue to happen. I am no longer afraid, but excited. I look forward to the future of my church. God is in control. I see Him at work in so many different outlets that I would have never dreamed. God has opened the door in so many secular places for people to have an opportunity to know Him. I want God to plug me in where he wants me. I want to show love and compassion the way Christ taught us and showed us.

Here I go......

......are my favorite!

Jeff told me I would be up all night. I took a nap from 4-6:30. I couldn't help it, I was tired. So here I am at 11:45 at night. Guess this means nap tomorrow!

I am in a mood. I don't feel like reading anything the past two days. And I don't even feel like trying to but my thoughts in my blog. Lots of ideas run through my head, I just can't seem to get them down.

I actually took the dog on a run/walk tonight. I jumped in the pool when I was done, but it left me disappointed. The water felt warmer than the outside temp. I think it actually made me hotter. The house is more comforting because I have the air on 70!

Church was great. I was glad to hear attendance was up. It was definitely busier down at the preschool end. I enjoyed Riverdale. They are great and it was neat to have a change. But secretly, I missed our praise team. Good break for them though!

I went to the Boane's house after church. Jennifer and Ryan invited the class over. It was nice to get to meet some of the parents. Of course, Heath was into everything. I am that parent of the child everyone talks about.

I am a little curious how it will be when Kaelyn starts school and Heath and I are left to ourselves. I am pretty confident he will keep me out of the stores.

Jeff was awesome, he unloaded the dishwasher and let me have a nap. He even went and got us pizza, since I slept through dinner.

I am looking forward to staying home tomorrow and catching up on Moses. I am getting close to his death. I keep flipping forward to see how far I have. I think I am still amazed he never made it in the Promise Land!

Gym

I just signed up for the cheap gym. Wish me luck! Sorry Angie, it is to hot to run outside.....even at night.

Bunko

I won most wins tonight! I think I will get a pedicure. Congratulations to Ariel for most Bunkos, Heather for Lambie, and Lisa for least amount of wins.

I wish I could......

hook my brain to my computer in the middle of the night. That is when I do the best blogging. Andrea, I made it through chapter 4. This book is amazing. (Blue Like Jazz).

I feel like Christ clicked with me back in June. I've had a personal relationship with Him since I was 15. But I put to many restrictions on it. Almost like being in a country club and you had to be careful how you acted or who you let in.

Every church I have attended has more than likely been filled with 90% Christians. The rest unsaved. I feel God has called me to me a part of a church that desires it to be just the opposite. This is my mission.

There is nothing wrong with other churches. I feel God gives us each a place to serve. I think there are many great churches in Orlando. All serving and meeting the needs for different people. My thought is.....if Jesus was invited to two churches on Sunday. He would want to be at the one with the nonbelievers.

OK, I got of track. I want to write more about the book I am reading. I can so relate. I remember being in church and wanting to rebel. If I was told not to drink, I wanted to drink. If I was told not to smoke, I wanted to try a cigarette. If I was told not to have sex, I wanted to try it. All in secret of course!

My sin nature makes me desire these things at times, but my spirit convicts me. Thank goodness!

In the book the author talks about going to one of the most secular colleges in America for a class. He is warned by his church of the evils of this college. This makes him sign up the next day.

He immediately makes friends with a atheist girl( who's father is a preacher). He never preaches at her, but develops a friendship with her. Through this friendship, he is able to share Christ with her. Long story short, this girl eventually accepts Christ has her savior.

I think about what might of happened if he has stayed away from this college. All because there were sinners there. He took a step out of his comfort zone.

I am so thankful that I stepped out of my comfort zone and stayed at C3. I am in my mission field. I am content, I am at peace, I have found joy.

Shout Out to Jon & Kate Plus Eight

I love this show on Discovery Health. It is about a couple who had twins through in vitro. Then later decided to try for one more and ended up with sextuplets. It makes my two seem like a walk in the park!

The two oldest are 5 and the the six youngest are 2!

I finally got it!

OK, after throwing my gift card in the trash.....I finally got my books. I am reading, Blue Like Jazz, first. Andrea was right, it is good. I immediately thought of a number of people who would also enjoy this book. I love any book where someone spills their innermost thoughts. Especially about Christianity.

I am only through the first chapter, but I can't wait to read more. I'll keep you up to date on my progress!

Ever Try To Make Someone Happy?

I know I have some issues in my life. I have always been a people pleaser. But, there is one person in my life I sometimes forget to please. Maybe it is because of the dynamics of our relationship and we've become to comfortable. I am feeling very convicted about the way I handle this relationship. Mostly because I am beginning to realize some of the things I am missing out on.

Lately, I've tried to make an effort. Doing things that I think will help. But, I feel like I am failing. Like I am missing the mark. But I have made the decision to push through. I know that through prayer and guidance, I can turn things around.

For Fun

This is on Monday Morning Insights. If you need a good laugh!
Meth Church

Random Thoughts Racing in My Head

I took off out to Disney last night with the kids again. We had a blast. We went out to the campgrounds and roasted marshmallows. After that we went swimming in the pool. I've been waiting all summer for Heath to sleep in and he chooses 2 weeks before school starts! Go Figure.

As the summer ends, I become more and more excited about C3's move to the theaters. I've come to realize how traditional our building is. I know God will use this building to serve another purpose for another church.

I am thankful for the staff and their wives. They are my role models. I wish I had only half their strength! I am thankful for their willingness to change and to take a stand. I have faith and trust them completely. I question nothing......I question no motives. All you have to do is look around the sanctuary and see all the hundreds of new faces. I know their hearts, their love for Christ, and their love for the unchurched.

I have never had a more life changing moment then when I decided C3 is for me. I've never felt Christ more alive in me. I've never felt a peace like this before. I know God had big plans for me.

Change

I changed my title. I think I need a class in blogging. I do good just to add the basics. I have lots to do today. My house needs some cleaning and I am out of good food. So, I'll write more later. Aren't you glad I shared!

I just had to say...

I am eating a whole bag of Apple Chips, reading everyone's blogs. Also hoping the chicken will defrost a little faster so I don't have to put it in the microwave. Wish I had the energy to make chocolate chip muffins. Kids don't really need chicken.....I think the muffins will go over better. Tee-Hee!

Sunday is always my Funday!

Sorry, I missed blogging yesterday. My cousin's were in town and I went out to meet them. We went through the Titanic exhibit. It was kinda cute. We then went to Monkey Joe's...note to self-Stay away on the weekends! And to finally end my night, I met them out at their hotel to swim. We watched Finding Nemo in the pool. Heath loved it. He stayed up until 12. So I may actually have the morning to myself!

Church was awesome!!!!!! Byron was on fire. I was so convicted that I needed to get off the bench and serve, I am just not sure where. I am such a thinker and not a doer...Are there any thinking ministries! Ha!

The last two songs before church ended, gave me goosebumps the whole time. When we sang, "The enemy has been defeated....." I almost started dancing. I was about to go Charismatic!

I was also impressed with the number of hands that went up, who have been at C3 for less than 2 years. I look forward to seeing those numbers double.

I was also convicted that I need to move on. I am no longer going to live out the past year in my mind and the mistakes I made. The stupid things I let consume my mind. The stupid things I spent time seeking, instead of seeking lost people. I have not a doubt in my mind that God has me where he wants me to serve(not be served)!

I am more and more excited about the theater. God has provided!

I know there are some cynics who think the church staff is making off with all of Parkway's money. They stole their church away. All the hard work building the church up is gone. I used to think these thoughts......I was blind! I think money is the number one reason most people are upset. I understand, it is my nature to want to protect my own personal money. I think it is the hardest thing to give that area of my life over to God. Yet is the most stressful area in my life.....and God takes care of all my needs.

I love the fact that we have so many new people and the people who have stayed, show no ownership. We cannot own our church and just because we might write the largest tithe check every month....we do not have control over the church. You cannot be crowned king, because you gave the most money.

I am preaching to myself.....I am not pointing a finger at anyone, but if the shoe fits! I know I am a work in progress when it comes to giving. I look forward to the lessons that God is going to teach me. In fact, I was reading in my bible that God tests us so we can learn about ourselves. I can truly say I have learned a lot of stuff about myself this year!

Yesterday

I thought I would write in purple. This week I have ran out for what I planned to be a few hours, into something always longer. I am exhausted and yet I am not finished running around. I have to drop my car off at Best Buy for an antenna to my Sirus. I've decided to put an overhead DVD player in too. (While I am at it!) Heath keeps pulling the wire out of the one you hook on your seat.

I took the kids to Picture People at the Millennium Mall. I usually go to Waterford. I loved this store. I thought it was a little more organized. Heath is getting ready to turn 2. I dread pictures with two little ones. Kaelyn actually did really well. Heath did well for about 3 min. out of the 15 min. schedule. Fortunately I was able to pick out some cute pictures.

I was going to try and make it to see Andrea, but after Heath dumped my coke all over the floor and screamed almost the whole time.....I had to go home. They wear me out.

I did sneak in a 30 min. nap. Although naps always make me feel like crap when I get up, but I love taking them.

Alright I am hungry so I am going to go make some breakfast. Maybe I'll write later today.

This is a fictional story sent through email, but I still think it is inspiring.



This just shows that GOD is in control

WHAT A STORY
A man from Norfolk, VA called a local radio station to share
this on September 11th, 2003. His Name was Robert Matthews. These are
his words. "A few weeks before September 11th, my wife and I found out
we were going to have our first child. She planned a trip out to
California to visit her sister. On our way to the airport, we prayed
that God would grant my wife a safe trip and be with her.

Shortly after I said amen, we both heard a loud pop and the car
shook violently. We had blown out a tire.

I replaced the tire as quickly as I could, but we still missed
her flight. Both very upset, we drove home.

I received a call from my father who was retired NYFD. He asked
what my wife's flight number was, but I explained that we missed the
flight. My father informed me that her flight was the one that
crashed into the southern tower. I was too shocked to speak. My
father also had more news for me. He was going to help. He said, "This
is not something I can't just sit by for. I have to do something."

I was concerned for his safety, of course, but more because he
had never given his life to Christ. After a brief debate, I knew his
mind was made up.
Before he got off of the phone, he said, "Take good care of my
grandchild."
Those were the last words I ever heard my father say He died
while helping in the rescue effort.

My joy that my prayer of safety for my wife had been answered
quickly became anger. I was angry at God, at my father, and at myself.
I
had gone for nearly two years blaming God for taking my father away.

My son would never know his grandfather, my father had never
accepted Christ, and I never got to say goodbye.

Then something happened. About two months ago, I was sitting at
home with my wife and my son, when there was a knock on the door. I
looked at my wife, but I could tell she wasn't expecting anyone. I opened the door
to a couple with a small child The man looked at me and asked if my
father's name was Jake Matthews. I told him it was. He quickly grabbed
my hand and said, "I never got the chance to meet your father, but it
is an honor to meet his son."

He explained to me that his wife had worked in the World Trade
Center and had been caught inside after the attack. She was pregnant
and had been caught under debris. He then explained that my father had been
the one to find his wife and free her.

My eyes welled up with tears as I thought of my father giving
his life for people like this. He then said, "There is something else
you need to know."

His wife then told me that as my father worked to free her, she
talked to him and led him to Christ.

I began sobbing at the news. Now I know that when I get to
Heaven, my father will be standing beside Jesus to welcome me, and that
this family would be able to thank him themselves.

When their baby boy was born, they named him Jacob Matthew in
honor of the man who gave his life so that mother and baby could live.

This story should help us to realize two things. First that God
is always in control. We may not see the reason behind things, and we
may never know this side of Heaven, but God is always in control.

And second is that though it has been several years since the
attacks, we should never let it become a mere tragic memory.

God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

I don't always like being a grown-up........

because it is so much responsibility. I actually remember being depressed when I graduated from college. I was not ready to face the real world. More than likely why many children end up back home with their parents.

Money stresses me out. I am so scared I am going to not have enough at the end of the month ( yet this doesn't keep me from shopping). And now that I am back at staying at home again, I've got to manage not having that extra income. Which most was spent on two mortgages while we waited for our other house to sell.

The funny thing is, God has never not met my needs. Although secretly I wait for it all to fall apart so I have this God-changing moment in my life. The one were you live in a "van down my the river". Although I think the less you have, the more blessed you are. I just wish I could get that through my thick skull.

I was watching Facing the Giants ( which I don't know why Christian movies are always a little corny)......Anyways, the coach in the story didn't have a lot of money. His house was falling apart, his car, his wife couldn't get pregnant, and he was about to lose his job. He finally Let GO and Let GOD. Toward the end of the movie one of the player's dad secretly gives his a brand new truck. It was amazing to see the joy on his face.

I think I sometimes miss out on this because I don't wait for God to bless me!

It even made me think of C3. In some people's eyes they think we've lost everything. They think how sad the attendance is down. They have to sell the building and move to a theater. Don't be sad....God is blessing our Church. It is all worth it to have one person come to know Christ, who might not have ever stepped foot in church before.

I've learned this past year not to try and always figure why things happen. Look for the blessings that follow!

Isaiah 40:31 (New International Version)

but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

God is Listening

Last night I went to check on my order for my books. I realized I had never received an email confirmation. I went to check and sure enough, it never processed for some reason. Well, I had used a gift card to buy them and the gift card was long gone in the trash. So for 30 minutes I tried to back track the information. I finally found the card number, but could not get the pin to show up.

So I started praying. I knew God was not going to perform a "magical trick" right in front of me, but I prayed some how I could recover the money on the card from having the gift card number. Moments later I though, "Why not look in the current trash can, just by chance."

Thank goodness Jeff had not taken the trash out with all the other trash(by the way, I will never get mad when he forgets). There in the very bottom the gift card sat! God heard my prayer. He even cares about my finding my gift card.

When You Are Mad or Hurt.......

what is your first reaction?

I am such a people watcher. I could sit at the mall for hours watching people interact. Even in restaurants I will take a peek around to see everyone. The best I've ever seen was at the local Cracker Barrel(go figure). There was a family of about 10 sitting together, looked like they were on vacation. All the sudden a younger man stood up and starting yelling at the family. He looked at his girlfriend and yelled, "You always take their side!" and some other few choice words. Well, the whole restaurant fell silent. So he looked at all of us and yelled, " What are you all looking at?" and stormed out of the restaurant.

I thought it was kind of funny. Jeff didn't, he hates Cracker Barrel. I won't tell you what he calls it.

This past week, I've seen, heard and even experienced hurt or anger. Last week I really had my feelings hurt, I was embarrassed too. All these evil and ungodly thoughts started entering my head. I was thinking over all the different scenarios in my head to get back at the hurt I was feeling. The person who was mad at me decided not to talk to me for a whole day. I even made the first move and apologized, but it took a day for this person to come around. I think we all just handle our anger different.

I really could have let the situation explode and made a mountain out of a mole hill. Like I've done so many times in the past. Right now there is a situation in my family that anger has got the best of. Pride is a major factor. The sad thing is this mole hill could leave a family broken.

So today I plan to search my bible for issues on anger. I know the right thing to do, I just need a refresher course. I want to act the right way when someone does me wrong or I've wronged somebody. I think it is best to get it solved right away. Time only makes it worse! Above all ask God to give you the right words to say, before your mole hill becomes a mountain.