Why can I be so moody?!?

I hate not having my quiet time in the morning. I tell myself it will be easier to wait until night, when there are less distractions. Night comes and then I am to tired. It's easier to veg on the couch. Then I feel guilty.....I had plenty of time, I just choose to do other things. By the end of the night I was in a bad mood. Really for no reason.
This morning is already better. I was able to have my quiet time and coffee! The two always go together. I love starting in the old testament and flipping forward into the new testament. I am learning some many new things I never really saw before. I read a little in Mark this morning too. I guess I never realized how the Pharisees looked at Jesus as being evil. They didn't like his teaching style or the way he questioned their traditions and customs. In Mark 3:1-6 , Jesus went into the synagogue, and a man with a shriveled hand was there. He was being watched closely so they could find a reason to accuse Him of breaking the law. They wanted to see if He would heal the man on the Sabbath. Jesus didn't violate the Ten Commandments, but He refused to obey man-made laws. Instead of the Sabbath being seen as God had intended, it had become a joyless ritual because of Pharisees' regulations.
I think about my worship on the Sabbath. How many times I've I gone to church, because I was supposed to go, God would be disappointed if I didn't go. I guilted myself into going. It had become a joyless ritual for me. I was not experiencing true worship! It's ironic. I loose all the programs and activities that I thought were important or would make me a better Christian, and now I am closer to Christ than I've ever been. I am experiencing true worship! I am experiencing a real relationship with Christ! God is awesome! I feel like a new Christ Follower. It's sad that I thought I had to do all these things to look "good" in God's eyes. Not that these things are bad. I just did them for the wrong reasons. Selfish reasons. I don't ever want to fall in that trap again.
It's funny how we take such an ownership in our church. What I've forgotten is church is for the unsaved. For people who aren't perfect. For people who don't know Christ and His blessings. If I make church a place that meets my needs, I forget about the needs of the unbeliever. I've been meeting my needs for too long. But times have changed and I am new person!