I've changed........

for the better. Yesterday was a yuck day, but I am feeling great today. I think the coffee helped. Thanks for going with me Amanda! The dog woke me up a 4 this morning. I took two unisom last night, so I could go back to bed after his morning pee. But the minute I went out the front door, I saw the most beautiful sight. The moon was hanging in the sky between two houses and a tree. There were a few stray clouds covering it. It was so cool to see the clouds look bright white in the dark sky. Needless to say, I really didn't go back to sleep.
The minute I wake up, I start thinking about church. I think about how lucky I am. I am glad God helped me have a change of heart.
When I was struggling to make a decision. I think about all the stupid things I let influence my thinking. I would go out on the Internet. I thought my friends were "brainwashed"! Now I think others probably think the same of me. People used to ask me if I thought my friend would get smart and get out. I desperately wanted that. I hated seeing my closest friend being bashed. I used to think, "When this all blows over.....everyone will be friends again!" I hate conflict. I can't even watch talk shows were people argue. It makes me feel awkward. Which is dumb, because nobody on the T.V. know I am watching. Anyways......
I am not proud of the way I acted or the things I said or the things I agreed on. But you know what's awesome....my C3 family forgives me. They have done nothing but encourage me and show me love. They have never once asked me all the crazy things people said or about the gossip I've heard. Plus, I would never want to hurt them or make them mad.
I now see and feel how much they were hurt. I understand why they moved on and are focusing on the mission God has layed out before them. Before I thought, "Oh, they must be doing something wrong, they won't meet with this person or answer this question!" This was a lie I let myself believe. I was so wrong. I am so happy I get it now. I get why we became C3. I get the vision. I get the plan God has for my life. I've changed. And change is good!